his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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