i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
