did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Randomize
