I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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