I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
