Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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