Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
