She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I met the friendliest cop last night
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Randomize
