I'm going to jail i love you
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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