I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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