Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
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