I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
End of the semester and I banged 14 freshman. I'm like my own welcome to college orientation guide.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I walked outside and found some random guy passed out on our front porch. We managed to acquire the 12 pack of lagers he had so it's all good.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
