Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
