You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
