So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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