I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
