I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize
