Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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