i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
