It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize