the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I am full of burrito and curiosity
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
