I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
