i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
This is the high leading the old right now
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
