As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
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