i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
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