I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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