How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
