Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth