ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Randomize
