Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
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