"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Tell me why I go to the dollar store for nail polish remover and a ghetto black dude trys to hit on me in the parking lot, then he gets in line behind me with a dousche bag literally and that is his only purchase.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Randomize