How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
