i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Randomize