No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
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Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
My face smells like last night's lay. I need a whore bath. Or a corndog.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Doing bumps while the kids play upstairs. #bestnannyever
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
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