Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
you would pick up someone in the library
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
