is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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