Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
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