I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
I love you. Go after that dick
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Who did he bring home?
Idk. But did you see her shoe choice by the stairs, I'm really not expecting anything great.
Randomize
