I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Just puked most of my soul out..
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
