We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
