My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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