I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize