Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
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