y did u give ur computer a hand job?
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
