I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Randomize
