I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
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