ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
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I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
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Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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