Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
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