Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
