dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
