Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
Randomize
